This past week was one for the books as far as emotions go. I had a family emergency that had me very rattled. So rattled, I almost couldn't function. Though it was scary, I am positive this issue will be resolved soon. I apologize for not disclosing all the private stuff. It isn't my story to share other than saying, prayer is a powerful thing.
Due to the family emergency I took Friday off of work. I was going to travel to be with family but found it best to stay put and relax. The night before I had weird dreams and hardly slept. Work was not an option. Thank goodness for vacation time. I spent the afternoon with my husband. We went to our favorite seafood market called Roses Seafood. I discovered a later Friday afternoon arrival will get you in and out in ten minutes, as opposed to the line of customers that will take at least a half hour. But honestly, the wait is worth the time. Fresh seafood is so much better than frozen. We purchased fresh shrimp and salmon. I made a not so dark roux of chicken and shrimp gumbo. The flavor is amazing and all from scratch. The seasoning wasn't from scratch and that is alright with me. I found this amazing creole season at HEB, called 2 Gringos Chupacabras Cajun Rub. Wow! Just wow. I seasoned the chicken with this rub. It was pricy but worth the money. Next time I will put a bit more rub on the protein. Hubby is anxious to try on other dishes. Click on the caption for the link or find it at your local HEB.
I know the roux isn't as dark as most gumbos...I will definitely work on that issue next time, but the flavor and heat was all there. It was delicious😋
Saturday morning I woke up early. Hubby and I were at our fitness club at six am. I started my workout on the treadmill. I did a brisk half mile walk. This was my warm up. I moved to the gym floor and grabbed a 18 pound medicine ball, a kettle bell, and two 15lb dumbbells. I started my workout. I did a lot of arm exercises. Included squats and grass grabs with the dumbbells. This worked out my knees and lower back. My first set of squats were difficult. I had to stop and stretch my calf muscles. They were starting to tense up. I leaned again the rack of weights and let it out. I cried. I was hurting. I was embarrassed and mad at myself. Over a year ago doing twenty squats in a row and quickly was nothing. Now I was here crying barely able to complete 20. I was alone on the gym floor. I grabbed a towel and cried into the towel. I could hear myself cry mixed with the musical sound of Missy Elliott singing "We Run this," playing in my ear buds. I dropped the towel and looked over at my husband who was on his rower machine. He was pulling harder and faster on that machine as I watched. His struggle started almost four years ago and he looks amazing. I know I can do this.
My inner fear is that I won't do it. I don't want to fail. I don't want to look back on this in a year and realize I gave up on something I wanted. I know accountability and I don't mesh well. I don't want to be on medication anymore. I don't want to be chained to a glucose meter all day long. I want the freedoms that go along with being healthy. I realize this is whiny and pathetic. But I have to be honest about how I feel. I want to go about my days doing as I always have and not worry about what others see. But I do not like what I see. I want to love me. Less of me but love it. Does that make sense?
Before workout pic. Oh yeah did I mention an Aggie pays my bills? 🤣 Love you Hubby
Post workout locker room pick. Yes I was crying again. I was exhausted. I completed my gym time with 2 miles on the recumbent elliptical.
Now here we are Sunday. I took the day off from the gym. I am miserably sore. I can barely sit on the toilet without screaming. Don't judge me, I know we have all been here before. It is an awful feeling. Feeding the dog was a thrill. I had difficulty bending or squatting down to pick up his dog bowl and then putting it down on the ground was even more fun. Miles had the joy of watching me get crafty in tossing his bowl down and not breaking it. I clocked it at 1.5 minutes. He didn't appreciate the delay. I cleaned my kitchen today and cringed the entire time. Every muscle from my neck down to calves is killing me. I then decided to do my makeup and hair and get dressed to go to Target to pick up my monthly RX that cost me 93 bucks! So yes imagine the money I will save being diabetes free! Yo! My Quarters...we can do another gal's vacation sooner if I can kick this disease.
A new week is starting and I am optimistic I don't want to feel this soreness again. I am going to be at the gym tomorrow after work. That is a success for me. I will exit El Dorado and drive to that damn gym and make it my bitch! Sorry I had to pump myself up. 😉 Just Teltschik Like It Is. Happy Week.
Check out a story I am sharing. What is real and what is fiction? I will never tell or do you know already know?
Makeup and good lighting work wonders!
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